Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
