Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
