Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
