Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I can feel your judgement through the phone
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
