just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
