Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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