Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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