I just pynch a tree in the face
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize