he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I wish you could order shots online.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Randomize
