terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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