i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I have aggressive nipples.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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