I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize