No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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