I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize