I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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