This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
