Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize