Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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