Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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