i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize
