come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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