i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
