It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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