I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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