You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize