we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
