We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
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