i just wanna soil my oats bro
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
She's not a foreskin expert like you
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Randomize
