sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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