I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
