he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
