one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
