i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
