u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
