don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize