I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
