i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
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He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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