So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Randomize
