I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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