Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
