I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
