i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Randomize
