Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
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