He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
His hands were made for my vagina.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Randomize
