Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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