My nipple is on Facebook.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
