um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
