I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Randomize
