i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize