we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
