Me too!
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
why do cheetos always look like penises
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
